


Because of Us

by castielhummelstilinski



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-08
Updated: 2012-12-08
Packaged: 2017-11-20 14:49:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/586551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/castielhummelstilinski/pseuds/castielhummelstilinski
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After nearly six years since they last saw each other Kurt and Sebastian meet by chance. But first we see how they got there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Because of Us

Kurt sat alone in his apartment. His latest relationship with Mr. Seth Collins had just ended. He went to the kitchen grabbing a bottle of wine and the biggest glass he owned, he needed it after tonight. This newest breakup hurt more than the others. “This is all because of you” he said bitterly looking at the closet. For inside the closet held pictures and other mementos from a previous relationship. The worst (yet the best) relationship he’s had to date. 

Kurt and Sebastian were together for 4 years. Their time together was passionate, ranging from love to hate. Unfortunately the bad times outweighed the good. Kurt had loved Sebastian but he could see how unhealthy the relationship was and decided to break it off. Kurt hoped he would be able to move on from Sebastian and find happiness with another guy, one who he didn’t constantly fight with. One with whom he trusted completely. Since then there have been a few guys, all great, all loving. Yet here he was 5 years later another failed relationship behind him, and it was all his fault.

Anytime a new guy made a mistake he thought of Sebastian, and what Sebastian had done. Once it came to that it was over, Kurt could think of nothing else but Sebastian so he would end the relationship. Kurt became overly cautious when meeting new guys; he wanted to save himself and others from heartbreak.  
Then there was Seth. He loved Seth and Seth loved him. It wasn’t like with Sebastian, Seth never gave him a reason to doubt his love. But he still held back. Seth knew of Kurt’s past and did everything he could to make him forget Sebastian and the heartache associated with him. But Kurt couldn’t forget.

Seth came home a few hours later than usual and that’s when it all ended. As Kurt sat alone waiting for Seth to come home he flashed back to one of his many fights with Sebastian. It was 2 o’clock in the morning when Sebastian finally stumbled home. Quietly shutting the door (or so he thought) he turned on the kitchen light, startled to find Kurt. 

“Hey babe” Sebastian slurred leaning down for a kiss only to be pushed away.

“Don’t ‘hey babe’ me. What happened to ‘I’m going for a quick case winning drink with the guys, be home by 8? 8 Sebastian! It’s 2 AM.” Kurt said angrily.

Sebastian groaned “Not this again…”

It was one of many redundant fights they had, and when Seth came home late it was like being with Sebastian all over again. Kurt had immediately launched into a tirade against Seth, not giving him a chance to explain. 

When Kurt finally stopped Seth looked at him sadly “I’m not Sebastian” he said hurt. “If you would have given me a chance I would have told you that the subway stalled so I had no service, I couldn’t call you. And when I did get in a service area I tried calling but you didn’t answer.” Kurt then realized his phone was in the bedroom, on silent. “But it doesn’t matter because every mistake I make you compare to him. Every little thing that goes wrong comes back to him.” He sighed “I’ve tried Kurt, I really have. I tell you I love you. I show how much I care, but it’s never enough. You may think you’re over Sebastian, but you’re not. I’m going to stay with my brother; I’ll get my things this weekend.”

“No” Kurt pleaded “please don’t leave, I love you.”

Seth gestured toward the closet “You can’t let him go, Kurt. I’ve known this for awhile but I thought maybe, just maybe you would be able to someday. But then I come home late one time and you jump to conclusions. I’ve been dealing with him for too long and I just can’t do it anymore, I’m sorry.”  
Kurt watched him leave. He didn’t try to stop him because he was right. So here he sat drinking alone glaring at the closet. “It’s been 5 years Sebastian, why can’t I let you go?” he asked out loud. “I know breaking up with you was the right thing to do, so why can’t I move on? I hate you.”

Kurt laid down on the couch, too tired to move to the bedroom, plus he didn’t want to sleep in their bed (his bed now) alone. “You ruined my life” he said bitterly “I just lost an amazing guy because of you. You caused me so much heartache.” He stretched out the couch wasn’t very comfortable. “I hate you” he said yawning.  
“But I love you” he muttered before drifting off to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Sebastian began to tense up the closer he got. He’s avoided this entire area for the past 5 years, but today’s trip was unavoidable. His new client lived down the block and he had stupidly agreed to a home meeting before realizing just how close it was to his-their-former building. He stopped in front of the building and found the window to the apartment he shared with Kurt. He sighed deeply, this was not the time to take a trip down memory lane, but he couldn’t help it.

Sebastian thought back to one of the worst days of his life, the day Kurt left. He watched as Kurt packed away the last of his things. In a matter of minutes Kurt would leave the apartment they’ve shared for the past 3 years and he would probably never see him again. He was about to lose the best thing in his life and he only had himself to blame.

Sebastian loved Kurt and Kurt loved him in return, but things between them had always been rocky. They both had fiery personalities and clashed more often than not. Friends and family often asked why they stayed together and the answer was simple; love. Because despite the constant bickering they did love each other. Their good times far outweighed the bad, and for them that was enough. But love can only go so far.

It was a night like any other, Sebastian told Kurt he was going out for a case winning drink with the guys from work and he would be home soon. Soon turned into 6 hours later. When Sebastian got home he found Kurt waiting in the kitchen. Admittedly he was a bit drunk and didn’t notice how upset Kurt was. He tried to kiss him and was pushed away, thus began a new fight. Sebastian figured it would be the same as the others. They would fight about Sebastian being late and not calling. They would yell at each other. Say things they didn’t mean before they eventually calmed down long enough to have heated make up sex, then all would be right in the world. But this time was different.

Kurt had reached his breaking point. Unbeknownst to Sebastian, Kurt had been thinking about the unhealthiness of their relationship for some time. He was worried that things would never get better and he didn’t know if he could handle it anymore. Sebastian coming home late, again, proved to him that things would never change. Sebastian tried to convince him to stay, that they belonged together, but Kurt could not be persuaded. The day Kurt left was the hardest day of his life. He had to watch as Kurt packed up their life and leave him. He didn’t say anything to stop him, he had his chance and lost it. 

Sebastian shook his head bringing him back to the present. It was useless to dwell on the past. Kurt was gone and nothing would change that, especially now that Kurt was with Seth. Despite his better judgment he’d kept tabs on Kurt through the years, he just wanted to know that Kurt was happy . After a few failed relationships it seemed like Kurt had finally settled down. 

Sebastian had always hoped that one day he would get his chance again. When Kurt left he was forced to really look at himself. He had changed a lot through the years, he grew up. He was still the same person but he was more responsible and he knew, he just knew that if he could try again with Kurt it would work this time.   
But Kurt had Seth now and Sebastian had no one. And that’s just the way it was.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Kurt sat alone in Central Park reading a magazine. He took a sip of coffee and almost choked when he heard a familiar voice greet him. It had been so long since he heard that voice, almost 6 years, but he would remember it anywhere.

Sebastian was jogging through the park. He always took the same path but today he decided to try a different path, it was the best decision of his life. There sitting alone on a bench up ahead was Kurt. He couldn’t believe his eyes, it’s been so long since he’s seen him but there was no mistaking that porcelain skin and gorgeous hair. Kurt was busying reading a magazine and didn’t see him approach, “good” thought Sebastian, “I can surprise him”.

Sebastian stopped in front of Kurt and cleared his throat “Hi Kurt” he greeted; he debated making a joke but decided the simple route was better.

Kurt slowly put down his magazine and looked up “Sebastian?” he questioned even though he knew the answer, he stood up and hugged him tightly “Oh my god, it’s been so long. How are you?” he asked. He sat back down and motioned for Sebastian to join him.

“Not bad. Can’t complain too much. I was made partner a few years ago so the work’s good. How about yourself?”

“Wow congratulations” he said giving him another hug. “I’m doing well. Still working at Vogue, only the magazine now rather than the website. I like it.”

“That’s great” replied Sebastian. He waited a second hoping Kurt would talk about Seth. He didn’t want to ask, to reveal that he even knew about him but he had to know. “So…how’s Seth?”

“Seth?” Kurt questioned, looking confused “how did you even know about him?” He smiled “Have you been keeping tabs on me Mr. Smythe?” He asked poking him in the ribs playfully.

Sebastian laughed “No of course not. Just, you know, heard through the grapevine” he lied.

“Well I think you need to find a new grapevine, me and Seth broke up over 6 months ago.”

“Oh I’m sorry Kurt, from what I heard you two were pretty serious.” Sebastian replied but couldn’t keep the smile off his face.

Kurt laughed “I’m sure you are. We were…but things happen.”

Sebastian could see that Kurt was trying to keep the mood light but he could tell the breakup was still fresh. “I really am sorry Kurt, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

Kurt shook his head “No it’s fine. You didn’t know. We were together for a few years and I loved him, but it never would have worked out.” It never would have worked out because I’m still in love with you, he thought. 

“Oh” Sebastian didn’t know what to say. Everything was going good and then he went and made things awkward by bringing up Seth. Worse yet next Tuesday was a special day.   
He had been dreading it and really didn’t want to bring it up now but he had already ruined the carefree atmosphere, there was nothing left to lose.  
“So do you know what Tuesday is?” Sebastian asked nervously.

Kurt stiffened. He knew. Of course he knew. Tuesday would have been their 10 year anniversary. It was the first thing he thought of when he saw Sebastian. “Of course I know.”

“10 years is a long time. I knew we would never make it.” Sebastian laughed nervously. He was so stupid; he should have never brought it up.

“Sebastian, don’t” Kurt said taking his hands “I never thought that and was sad when I was wrong.”

“Were you wrong?” Sebastian asked softly. He still loved Kurt and hoped with all his heart that Kurt felt the same.

Kurt smiled “Maybe I wasn’t.”

Kurt wasn’t wrong. They talked for the rest of the afternoon and made plans to meet again on their anniversary. It would stay their anniversary.   
The love was always there they just needed time. Time to grow up. Time to find out how to work with each other rather than against. Of course it wasn’t perfect, nothing ever is. They were still fiery but now they knew how to contain that fire instead of letting it burn and destroy.


End file.
